The
Proposition/The Proposal
Shoah/Showgirls
Too
Soon? Yes..? No..? Have the scars still not healed? Stylo was given
to understand it had become a cult classic that’s all the rage
within the ‘camp’ community, who regularly clan together for
theme evenings that include dressing up as their favourite characters
and joyously singing along with the catchy tunes. The other, of
course, is an unremittingly bleak and emotionally exhausting Paul
Verhoeven atrocity that many still find too harrowing to sit through.
Knight
and Day/Day For Night
A
film within a film about the making of James Mangold’s
Cameron/Cruise howler might have made for a revealing insight as to
how the modern blockbuster is shunted together out of a flyblown
clusterfuck of bargain-bucket ideas, shameless product placement,
green-screen effrontery and sheer bloody mindedness. As it is we have
to content ourselves with Truffaut’s
romantic hymn to the production process,
which – to be honest – would have benefited greatly from a few
4X4s flipping over lengthwise and a couple of exploding taco stands.
Feds/Reds
Sometimes
the tiniest grain of sand can trip you up: in Terry Gilliam’s
sparkling clockpunk bureaucratopia Brazil, a minuscule
typographic error
sets off a chain reaction that explodes into mayhem, madness and
state-sponsored murder. In the real world, one wrong keystroke into
your Lovefilm account and your Friday night no longer consists of a
five-hour lecture on blow-dried Bolshevism, but a slapdash
eighty-minute cackfest
starring TV-Movie parolee Rebecca DeMornay. Enjoy.
Cinema
Paradiso/Guest House Paradiso
Oh,
the magic! Oh, the emotion! Oh, the pure joy of cinema! The laughter,
the tears, the misty-eyed nostalgia for a wholly imagined pastoral
Arcadia! Oh,
the Vesuvian vomit!
Oh, the pan-fighting! Oh, the red
rubber mankinis!
If one, both or neither the Italian mini-masterpiece nor Rik and
Ade’s hopeless fistic folly reduces you to a puddle of salty tears,
then you’re not plumbed in right.
Tootsie/Tsotsi
Don’t
eff this one up, as a Sunday afternoon under the duvet with a box of
Maltesers, a Skol
Superstrength spritzer and
some mild – but not completely unwelcome – sexual disorientation
watching a frocked-up Dustin Hoffman teetering through the pastel
thrum of Eighties Broadway is a very different prospect than one
spent quivering and cowering amid the diesel fumes, gang violence and
squalor of Soweto slumland. Come to think of it, both are pretty high
on the Yikes!-o-meter…
The
Thin Red Line/The Thin Blue Line
Pretty
gloomy either way, but at least Errol Morris’s groundbreaking crime
doc doesn’t entirely consist of sweaty pretty-boys with $100
buzzcuts staring at ferns. Your call on this one.
Babe/Babel
One
is a critical smash and box-office behemoth that suggested that we’re
not all that different under the skin; that our hopes, fears, dreams
are all crystalline droplets from the same communal wellspring of
shared experience that will all eventually flow together to join the
great river of life. The other – that’s right we’re pulling the
same shit twice – is about Brad Pitt’s abortive Moroccan
gap-year. We know which one we’re watching!
Holiday
Inn/Hostel
We
all love to fly by the seat of our pants now and again, but sometimes
it really pays to check the guide books – although, for some, being
tortured with a power-drill is infinitely preferable to witnessing
Fred Astaire and Bing Crosby mercilessly ba-ba-ba boom their way
through an entire calendar of public holiday-infested showtunes with
the likes of ‘White Christmas’, adenoidal valentine ‘Be
Careful, It’s My Heart’
and the frankly staggering blackface turn ‘Abraham’
they put on to celebrate – and you’ll like this! – Lincoln’s
birthday.
Monster’s
Ball/Monsters Inc.
Want
to keep the anklebiters quiet while you sleep off one of your special
‘Saturday Morning Headaches’? Well, plonk them in front of either
of these little beauties and it’s unlikely you’ll hear a peep put
of them until ‘Football Focus’ starts…
Do Not
To Be Also Not Confused With…
84
Charing Cross Road/10 Rillington Place
Runaway/The Runaways
The
Aviator/The Navigator
Lenny/Kenny
The
Road/The Road (to Morocco)
Silent
Running/Cool Runnings
Leon/Leon The Pig Farmer
Any
more for any more...?
Copyright 2012 Adam Lee Davies. Reproduced from http://exrenthell.blogspot.co.uk with permission.
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